Blog Entry #1
The exciting nature of youth lies in its unpredictability; to be young is to be flowing down a gushing stream, completely unaware of what truly awaits beyond the horizon. Right now, I feel as though my journey down the stream is about to reach a peak from which I will gain momentum as I rush over an edge, falling headfirst into a waterfall of opportunity and adventure. While I still continue to prepare myself mentally and emotionally for my month abroad in Barcelona, only a week of waiting remains before my anticipation comes to an abrupt halt as I will finally pick up my suitcase, meet my fellow Ayusa students, and soar on over to Europe.
Glancing at the calendar, my jaw drops, my mind freezes, my heart transfigures into the desperately anxious wings of a bird longing to shatter the iron bondage that has for so long kept it back, safe in a nest. With the exhilarating realization that I’m going to be leaving to Spain in almost no time comes the shock- I’ve not finished packing. Lying on the white leather couches of my sister’s new apartment in Los Angeles, I find myself a continent away from all my belongings in New York and the suitcase that I began to prepare for my trip to Spain. The slightest panic grips my heart at the thought that I left such an important task undone, but it eases; I’ll be returning home on the 28th of June. That should give me plenty of time to organize all the clothes and provisions I had already laid aside to take to Spain as well as a chance to quadruple-check that I took everything I could possibly need. Thinking over the list of things that I planned to take, I couldn’t help but begin to ponder the “big” life questions: Should I take my hair dryer? Will I need more nail polish remover? What if I need to trim off my dead ends while I’m overseas? My soul was truly conflicted. However, I knew most of these questions would eventually answer themselves, whether I liked the answer or not. At this point in time my hands are tied in terms of my ability to deal with the preparation of my physical possessions, but I could certainly prepare in other ways.
My goal for this program, as I explained to my sister last night, is to emerge from my month abroad as a better person than when I left home. I use the vague and subjective term “better” for a reason, for it can encompass more meaning as a person’s interpretation of the word evolves. Currently, that word from my perspective involves being happier with myself; to me, “better” means more educated, more culturally informed, and more generally understanding of people. I want to touch the lives of the members of my host family and all the people I meet on my adventures throughout Spain, forming bonds that will survive throughout the years. I want to absorb the melodic language being sung all around me and retain enough of it to be able to have a conversation with a native speaker. In addition, I want to learn more about myself and prove to myself that I can be as capable and mature as I expect of myself.
Perhaps it is a feeling produced by naivety, but I am overwhelmed with confidence when thinking of the journey ahead. I believe that there is nothing in life that is truly worth being afraid of as long as every decision is made with care and consideration; to truly and fully experience life is to take those chances that may initially seem intimidating. Most regrets come from the things we didn’t do when the opportunity presented itself. Keeping that in mind, my main goal for my first study abroad experience is to return home with absolutely no regrets. I plan to return home a “better” person and will do the utmost to prevent anything from getting in my way.
Why do I want to study abroad?
Engulfed and swallowed by an ever-bustling sea of unfamiliar faces, a young girl of barely sixteen rushes through the bustling crowd into the neon courtyard of Times Square. It’s just another day in the heart of New York City as she watches her breath dissolve into the humming air, and the wind chill paints her cheeks with blooming roses. The snow has covered the skeleton of a mighty tree, towering overhead, whispering with age-old wisdom, and its simplicity is strikingly beautiful. Witnessing this scene, I became aware of the life rushing around me, taking notice of the preoccupied expressions engraved onto the faces of my fellow human beings. In the racially and ethnically diverse metropolis of “the Big Apple”, one may bump into, trip over, or rush past individuals with cultural roots extending from all corners of the world. A wince conquers my features as I wonder why none of the hearts before me seem to have any interest in the world of their neighbors. Have these same thoughts crossed the minds of others?
Growing up in a family of Russian immigrants, I have had the honor of living with a bilingual perspective and exceptionally open mind. Though born in the United States and raised to possess the freedom-loving spirit of America, I learned to appreciate all the unique ideas and traditions associated with Russian and Slavic culture. I came to understand the true beauty of diversity. With this perspective, all peoples became works of art, carefully crafted by the talented hands of History; each man became an abstract painting that could offer new meaning and insight into the workings of mankind. While I spent the majority of my life in New York City, exposed to dozens of foreign languages and cultures, time brought me to the conclusion that my purpose in life was to become a true citizen of the globe, a worldly and understanding person that would eventually succeed in serving her country with a career in international relations. From early childhood, my sole ambition in life was to travel and see all the beauty Earth had to offer; with age came the aspiration to contribute to the world I lived in, and to make it a better place. The major question that came with this decision hit me soon after: “Where do I begin?”
I decided the first and most important step was to gain understanding; only by exposing and immersing myself in various foreign cultures could I ever hope to possess enough insight to understand people and create change. I developed a fervent yearning to study abroad. This driving desire led me to attend an International Peace Festival abroad in Artek, Ukraine, travel to the Dominican Republic to witness the impoverished but appreciative lifestyle of the natives, and educate myself in foreign languages. Studying abroad will widen my eyes with each new experience; it will help me learn enough to someday understand the sea of bustling faces that weave around me throughout my life.


















